Russ Quotes

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Creamy as fuck, but it doesn't have the ripple or pistachios in it.

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It's super satisfying scraping the sides and the flavour's way better

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Great texture, but lacking some flavour.

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That's got the satisfying shell, where that's got the satisfying scrapes, but they taste very similar.

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I think sour watermelon's the best

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I think sour watermelon's the best, followed by sour green apple

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it's this flavour that always stood out and intrigued me

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That tastes dead set like a Pavlova.

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It's kind of giving cherry ripe vibes more than a Lemington to be honest.

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If they tripled the amount, that would be a ten out of ten tub.

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expecting a Bruce Bogtrotter amount of fucking mud cake

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It's given a splice vibe with the vanilla ice cream and the watermelon.

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The passion fruit really levels that out to just be an awesome Zoopa Doopa.

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It's a love-or-hate flavor, that one, but I fucking love it.

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That's vanilla Coke. That is... fucking gorgeous.

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Did you just have the Billsons musk? That's off its head, exactly the same as that.

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nothing says summer like a sink full of just the top of Zoopa Doopas

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Eight and a half, like a blueberry cruiser with a raspberry mixed together.

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That one's the most summer of the lot.

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that aftertaste of the Passion Pop is giving me some of the most fucked up memories of my life. Ones that I've had to go to therapy to bury.

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like a war flashback

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You'll shit yourself before you get drunk, but fuck me. If you're a Jaffa fan, that's the must try.

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Wow, I am honestly surprised, I thought that was gonna be shit.

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six of these freezing cold in the esky

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You can cover a fucking plover or a magpie in buffalo sauce

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Buffalo sauce on anything makes it better, I fucking told you.

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The McSpicy's went downhill. It's got like a chemical aftertaste

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That could be a fucking dodo's wing. It's that fucking old.

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This is like the Big Nuts version of a blueberry cruiser.

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they choose their flavours from the best-selling Alibaba or iGet at the local Easy Mart

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This is dead set a chouf flavour

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This is Festive Piss

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It honestly tastes like a hard solo with a nice fizzy wine aftertaste.

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there goes the fucking down light

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This shit's the reason your mum hasn't left your fucking dad yet.

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It looks sexier, but it doesn't taste sexier.

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tell your mum to send me a DM and you might get a new stepdad

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once you play a monopoly you never want to play again for like ten years

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That makes the after dinner mint taste like a piece of shit

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tastes like the outside of a Ferrero Rocher

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It's that sweet caramello koala flavored caramel, but it's missing that gooey texture

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The Hunt for Festive Piss UK exclusive

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If you're an orange chocolate lover, that is a 10 out of fucking 10, but an 8 out of 10 for normal people.

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Honestly, it would have got a 10 out of 10 if it was double dipped the whole way.

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it's not the size that matters. It's the way it tastes, I've heard

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It's gonna make your fuckwit family more bearable this Christmas

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not gonna blow your speedos off this summer like the mango did

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If you like Passiona and fruit punch, that will be one of the best drinks you've ever fucking had.

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It's not that good, normal cream and soda is better than that, but it's cool.

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That's a fucking cane toad, not a frog.

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Looks like Kermit after a five day meth bender

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That's like the oak you would drink over the Christmas holidays.

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It's got a strong real coffee taste.

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This needs to replace the other fucking one we've got.

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This makes splice look like a little fucking bitch.

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This is exactly the way I remember, and it is a ten out of fucking ten.

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If you love Jaffa, you will fucking love that.

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How about you make your mcfucking mind up, you mcfuckwits.