Russ Quotes

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It hurts to say this, but it's a fucking 10.

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I think this fucking cheesecake's been dumped. It's very sandy.

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like getting dumped under a wave with heaps of sand in your undies

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Whittaker's white chocolate which is the best white chocolate I've had with jelly tots.

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A bit odd tasting smoky barbecue through a burrito, but if I just wanted beef, I would've stuck to fucking beef brisket.

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this could be a redemption story

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I fucking love that green sauce, I'll bathe in that shit.

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can't make any jokes about what it does to me guts

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this could be any sweet coffee, I'm not tasting any tiramisu

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perfectly balanced between twang, sweet and cream

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I'd recommend adding coffee to a normal vanilla thick shake... that's better than this

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the hazelnut covers up that fucking colostomy bag taste that Macca's got

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this is gonna be rough for breakfast day

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It's like a top deck fucking Kit Kat.

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this is Hoppawattie's jersey. That's why I'm wearing a Tiger's one

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It tastes like a Macca's orange juice. Slightly carbonated.

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I don't want the top of my mandarin looking like a puckered asshole

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imagine you're biting the pillow, but someone's left a bit of whiz fizz on it

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I've had some fucking terrifying tangs in my time

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It's like a watered down golden bash.

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I call these poppers. What do you use to call them?

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A better aftertaste.

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Just, I don't want you to find out. Don't bother.

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That's an eight and a half. That's really fucking nice.

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I've put me fucking ball sack on it

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It was like mango and dirt, and there's the heat in the back of the throat.

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Thought I got a dirt bean boozled

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Up front, big red chewy. Fucking mad. And then the aftertaste in that one is like poison.

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Like green cordial jelly bean with a bit of spice.

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Generic flavours, but a good gum and tang.

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Same as these, so whatever I gave them last time.

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piss per dollar

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Fruitylexia and Fat Lamb will be shaking in their boots

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Lemon cordial meets the lemonade stand, like a little bit of lemon twang

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You know when there's like blood in your wee?

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talked about in history, when electricity was invented

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Yeah, it's like an adult yoga, that's actually fucking mad.

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Instead of tasting like an iced coffee, it tastes like a coffee that's went cold

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And it's the best flavour.

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took me 5 woolies to find this

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That is so accurate and so fucking jolly.

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It looks kind of soggy, not crispy on the edges, but it tastes fucking crispy.

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Chicken. Nothing special with chicken.

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They taste almost honey soy with the satay, which I think's fucking mad.

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It's like pho meets chow mein.

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It's quite fucking, quite brilliant.

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It's like someone's just whipped Mocona through cream.

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I think you know what it would taste like, so we won't spend too long on it.

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Water down. I think the ice has melted.

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Basically fried rice, but instead of the egg being chopped up through it, it's on top.

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I'm making a chip bomb

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That tastes like when you have chocolate ice cream, and then it melts and then refreezes

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Fucking like the old snow cone machine.

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Basically chocolate ice cream snow cones

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That's the best McCrispy I've had.

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Shit without the pickles. With the pickles, probably an eight.

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Oh, fuck on the carpet.

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It just tastes like a normal chicken wrap.