Russ Quotes

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like a red skin mouthguard

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efficient on the time versus calorie intake

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I love a good chew

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McMuffins are as dry as your nan's moot

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I swear these are the old ones they don't sell

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For legal reasons, I must state I was joking

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peanut butter with a golden retriever and a freshly shaven ball sack

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Let's fucking go

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you wonder why I have trust issues with me fucking ass

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Kids today are so spoilt... their fruit tastes like lollies

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Soz I mentioned twang twice

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I never tried one of them, but your mum did

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the Woolies rip off

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do we really like turtles this fucking much

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Dad's having a Bundy spider for dessert and you're having a broken fucking jaw

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teleports me back to playing knee footy in the lounge room with carpet burns

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the kings of plagiarism are back

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this is dinner for the next five nights

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the correct way to eat noodles is drain the water and then add the seasoning

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That with vanilla ice cream would be like the ultimate fucking spider

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officially assigning 1x by 3 Days Grace to the White Aldi one

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what they call the BP or we call the boy poi

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My recommendation, bring a bib.

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No, I haven't time travelled back to 2011

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horny little milf magnets

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Get the dehumidifier out if your mum's drinking these

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16-year-old me at the skate park would fucking love that

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this is what people use to vortex

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I've just dropped the gun on the ground

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truck stop filled with a large cappuccino and a big, fat diarrhea through a port-a-loo

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I would only eat this hungover or before a 15km run

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I said Afregado last time and got fucking hammered

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Who the fuck is buying them over a picnic, okay?

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Is there fucking mucin in this?

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Battered smegma.

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kick a fucking turtle for a 40-20

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comes with a little stick so you can fling it

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go straight to head office and headbutt the CEO

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I just know I'm gonna shit myself, but I'm gonna do it

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Twister, he's had a good run, about time he's brought out some shit

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let's just pretend I haven't tried it before and have a bit of fun

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let's do some piss first

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I fucking love it. I fucking hate that.

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stick to a Red Bull and a Gatorade in each hand

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I don't want to lead yous astray because I've done that a few times

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ScoMo allegedly shat his pants and after this I might follow

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I don't know if that's PTSD, but I'm kinda getting spew

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looks like it's about to hit me up for child support in nine months

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The middle of the bun is subtle foreshadowing for my undies

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Don't leave your kids and dog in the car, okay? Love from Unky Russ

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Just chuck some peanut butter on that

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makes me want to listen to fucking toxicity up as loud as possible

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It turned me into Spongebob in this fucking episode

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where's the cranny granny? Right fucking here

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at the end of a CD they had a bonus track

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the little pizza boy behind the counter must have been having a good fucking day

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Don't put this in your guts at the end of the night... Be safe with a kebab

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cruiser doubles will be the Gen Z double blacks